Men spend half their time assembling their own chains and spend the other half carrying them. » Octave Mirbeau

Every day I hear people (myself included) complaining, grumbling, speaking loud and clear their displeasure. If asked, they often appear to have difficulties in expressing what they want. These people are focused upon what they don’t want, not what they want. Otherwise put, they say: “I don’t want this or that anymore” … instead of saying “I want this or that”.
In defining my objective as what I don’t want, I disregard my brain’s search‐and‐focus mechanisms in the first place because I actually order it to look for what displeases me; in a second time I set up an emotional loop that sends back a negative and frustrating picture.

When I express what I wish to aim for and not what bothers me, I spark my RAS (Reticulated Activator System, located at the base of the brainstem and acting like a radar) and I allow my brain to go search for what I wish.
On the opposite, when I express loud and clear what I don’t wish anymore I maintain the frustration that nothing changes in spite of my (wrongly aimed) efforts.

As a conclusion, here goes the tale of the three wishes…

There was in a village a poor man who’d worked during many long years. This guy had kids and, often, not a single piece of bread at home. He would have gladly – if given the possibility to do so – participated in any way in building the church. Upon seeing the rich people around passing by with their cars and carts loaded with stones to build the sacred place, the poor man pondered: “What shall I do, I miserable owning neither car nor cart?”
Well, the thought sprang to him to grab his basket and carry stones to erect the church, at night, while all were asleep. And this he did.
As he worked so, an oldie neared and asked him: “What are you up to here so late, my friend?” — Ah, said the guy, I have no car or cart but I’d still like to help build the church; therefore I take my basket and carry rocks when everyone sleeps.” The old man then told him: “Why, your toil will not remain fruitless, I grant you the possibility of three wishes.”
The poor guy thought for a minute and answered: “In that case, I’d wish for Heaven and eternal life when I shall die; as for this life, I’d settle for the old chest in the attic if it could be filled with gold without ever becoming empty. Otherwise, I need nothing else. Heaven and money are enough to me.
— Beware, said the smaller man, your house is a wreck and will crumble soon; who knows if you’ll live long enough to build a new one? Make another wish.
— Well, said the guy, I wish that my house become twice as large.
— All of this shall be granted you, said the little man, and he was gone.
When the crafstman came home he saw that his old house had been replaced by a new one, twice as big. The chest was full of gold and would fill itself up again whenever empty. Our guy lived serene and glad and, in his happiness, he never forgot churches or poor people. What had occurred remained not unknown in the village; everyone spoke about it. And this is how it came to a rich man’s ears, one horrible, greedy man who owned a lot yet never enough. “If only I’d be that lucky!” thought he. Taking a basket, he brought stones to build the church while everyone slept. Soon the oldie turned up and said: “Hey, my friend! What are you up to here so late?”
— I’m bringing stones, replied the rich man, when all rest and sleep.
— Therefore you will get to state three wishes,” said the small man. Having thought about it all beforehand, the rich one replied: “I wish a pair of good and lively eyes for my old horse; as to the other two wishes, they are to be stated by my wife.
— Then those wishes will become true, said the small man.
The second she spoke those words, her husband became blind as the old horse had been. The greedy man went into such a rage that he stated the third wish by shouting at her: “If you only want that, poor sap, I’d like to see you blind!”
Which happened. And that was their reward.” The second she spoke those words, her husband became blind as the old horse had been. The greedy man went into such a rage that he stated the third wish by shouting at her: “If you only want that, poor sap, I’d like to see you blind!”
Which happened. And that was their reward.